Things You Won't Do When You Really Love That Special Someone

- you won't tell her she's " the world's biggest mood spoiler".
- you won't even bear to squeal the word "FUCK' to her.
- you would never break off with her every other day like she's a fucking toy.
- if you didn't mean any of it, the LEAST you could do was give a call and APOLOGISE.
- i don't think you would even wanna break your promises, would you?
- you wouldn't cancel out on her TWICE on your ANNIVERSARY thou she made plans with you 2 weeks in adv.
- you wouldn't ignore whatever she has to say, especially if it's about YOU.
- you wouldn't even wanna push her away to other guys.
- you wouldn't say things to hurt her on purpose despite countless reminders not to.
- when you say you'd change your attitude, you'd change....right?
- dont wait for her to call... you don't have a phone?

It's been a NONG NONG day.

well well well. seems like its been a while since i last blogged. had been rather busy recently. everytime i'm on the com, i'm doing the stupid 11 java classes. and i have short attention span as most people know, so i never got it finished. haha.

today was tiring. woke up at freaking 7.30 in the morning to go to the zoo for work. and no, i'm not a zookeeper. neither am i a milkmaid. i went there to work for Aire Tattoo. yes. it's been a while since i last worked with them:)

thankfully my airbrushing skills are not as rusty as i thought it would be:) anyway. not long after i settled into the booth. a humongous orang utan came into my view!


ah! there it is! must be ah meng's wife and his kid.

this huge furry thing was walking up and down the entrance for a whole 4 hours! i wanted to go hug it but anna(boss) made a sick comment that made me change my mind. "i bet they didnt wash the costume for at least 5 years." bleah. fine i wont hug that cute thing then.

it wasnt long before the crowd came in for the tattoos. i wouldnt blame them. tattoos were going for $2 for black and $4 for colour. how cheap is that! you can never get such a good deal anywhere i tell you.

what a mess! we're definitely not neat people! and look at that leapord fur tablecloth!


ahhhh! my orang utan!!!

well. it rained today. so the business was pretty good. people had nowhere else to go. and the tattoos were a great way to buy time before the rain stops. but nearing 2pm, the crowd gradually died. and this is what we see... ...


nobody at all!!!


and ren rong(anna's kid) starts to go crazy...

so we closed shop early today. like around 3plus instead of the usual 7pm. which i find great as i had to go grandma's house for dinnner anyway. earned $42 for 6 hours for doing nothing much but slack!

At Grandma's Place...

daddy was bored waiting for dinner to be ready.

and when the food came, it was heavenly:) saw that huge bowl of curry? mom made it! YUM!:D

it's just the sister trying to be funny during the blackout :)

well, i've run out of pictures to show. yawn. guess i better get back to java. hohoho:)

All the reasons why...

Reasons why i should leave

- he doesn't need me, he said it himself.
- he has better things to do than hear me whine and cry.
- if i am important to him, why doesn't he call?
- if he loves me, why would just sit there and let me walk away?
- he isn't the same loving boyfriend i used to have.
- it takes two hands to clap. and i'm the only one clapping.
- he promised never to leave me, but guess who did the dumping serial?
- he walked out on me in the first place.
- he hurt me more than anyone did in my 17 years residence on Earth.
- he pushes me to other guys even though i've maed it clear I DONT LIKE THEM.
- if i "meant the world to him", wouldn't he be holding on tighty?
- if he truly truly loved me, he wouldnt be answering me "i don't know" when i ask him if he wants me.
- he's the first to make me cry till i bleed in the nose.
- he has this habit of hanging up on me.
- he doesn't love me.

Reasons why i should stay

- i love him
- i really really love him.
- i love him with all my heart.
- i never planned on leaving.
- he's my baby, mine and only mine.
- i have never loved someone so much in my entire life.
- i love his maggie noodles and nuggets.
- i love his soft warm hugs, i feel safe.
- i am on air everytime he kisses me.
- he is one of a kind.
- his laughter is evil and contagious.
- he's such a sweetheart.
- he amazingly puts up with my mood swings and tantrums.
- can love be explained in detail?
- his smile does wonders - it lights me up.
- his presence never failed to cheer me up.
- he makes me complete. he really does.

but does he feel the same way about me too? i guess not.

It's gonna be about ME ME and MEEE!

yawn. i'm dead beat. got home an hour ago. had some really good one-to-one time with sofiah today :) thanks darling!!!

i have alot of random photos which i would like to upload now. yeah yeah. i've been taking pictures non-stop everyday now. it has been a habit already. hurhur.


my phoneeey.


javaaaa programmingg. eeeeeeks!


me and mummy!


laptops everywhere!!!


da old man.


my grandma :) doesnt she look young?


i was bored. and this looks like a seat belt :D


Gene was sleeping.. Fadh took a pic.


this is what happens when your photo lands in fadh's hands. MUAHAHA.

well, i guess thats all for now. GENE, YOU LOOK GREAT UP THERE!!!. HAHAHA. yawn. it's been 2 hours posting this entry! goodness! blogger is damn laggy sia.

hurhur. anyway. goodnight folks:)

Hit with reality

well well well. i guess most people were disgusted by my previous post:) but i was just expressing my love.

looking back... i saw how sweet and easygoing me and daniel were last time. i always thought that he's the absolute one for me. and we would never part. i couldnt see myself without him. well, that was last time.

but things have changed. drastically. i am no longer as bubbly as i used to be. and i am crying almost everyday. why? because the one i love is dumping me every alternate day. and that is tearing me up. really badly.

i used to wonder what am i to do without daniel. and that without him, i'm never complete. because he made me feel me. i felt loved for a really long time.

but was i wrong? what if without him, things are actually better? sigh. i really dont know. i mean, i just cant go back to him everytime he wants me back and accept it everytime he dumps me :'(

i love him. and will always be loving him. but it's too painful to be carrying on like this.

daniel, hopefully if you see this, it's either we try to make this work for once or it's better if we part ways. i can only do so much. and it takes two hands to clap.

we might seem like the perfect couple. but there's so much more behind it.

Going down memory lane

the day we saw each other for the first time. we were at sentosa celebrating jas the lizard's birthday.


our rings. it's the same pair since day one.


on our second date.


the first toy. this came with the rings. the rings were hidden around the little bear's wrists. how sweet!:)


the day he met my mom for the first time. he was scared but kept his cool the whole time. how sweet again:)


the first neoprint together. this looks really sweet and innocent compared to the others. hahaha.


ahhh. this is a little more wild:)

a day with him never fails to bring joy to my life :)


we never run out of facial expressions =P


the sweetest presents anyone can get for christmas.


the good old times....

and the funny old times.....


taken during the job interview crazy period.


the hole we all dug.

we're gold diggers.

remember the late nights?

big feet and small feet.

remember how we did this for anna and andrew?

the lovely day at sentosa.

dont walk away from me.

the day you went away.......

*****************

Cause I want you,

And I feel you,

Crawling underneath my skin

Like a hunger,Like a burning,

To find a place I've never been

Now I'm broken,

And I'm faded,

I'm half the man I thought I would be:

But you can have what's left of me

The Similarities

currently listening to: Ashley Parker-Let you go (repeat track)


daniel reminds me so much of shawn.
shawn the exboyfriend.
shawn the one who hurt me throughout without knowing.
shawn the one who scarred me with his ignorance.
even the way we break up and patch are identical.

daniel and shawn's personalities are almost carbon copy.
maybe that's why i loved them and hated them the same way.

and maybe that's why i shouldnt continue the relationship with daniel.
coz i know eventually how it would turn out.
it's a repeating cycle.
with me on the losing end.

i have the urge to move on.
and get away from all these forever.
but i hang on. all because i love him still.
but is love alone enough?

whoever said "Love is all you need" is obviously an airhead.

Mambo Jumbo Post

It's 2am and instead of going to bed, here i am still sitting here. Well, not all time was wasted as i did maths tutorial 3. 1 question is enough to give me a headache.

Mass Powers wants me to go down to sign something. i presume it's a bonding contract which i hope i won't be stupidly duped into, thanks to Anna.

Jin's hamster Twinkle passed away this evening. it's been classified as an unnatural death. It makes me shiver, how fragile life can be. you might be alive for one minute and the next you're no longer in this world.

my dog Niki is 8yrs old now. closer and closer to the big 10. i hope he can live to at least 15yrs of age. sigh. thinking about doggie makes me feel like crying.

Roszana sold us some tickets to a rock concert on the 27th. i hope that would take my mind off things.

i'm working this Friday. yipee. double pay. i've only been working on double pay days this month. it saves me the trouble of working.

i bought my mom the K750i for Mothers Day, but i've been using it for these few days as my phone had to go under the knife. the phone might be mine again as mom complained that the received message fonts are too damn small.

oh well, maybe i'll get her the new nokia 3G. goodness. i dont even know the model.

i better go shut eyes now.ciao.

Nick Lachey - What's Left Of Me

Watch my life,
Pass me by,
In the rear view mirror
Pictures frozen in time
Are becoming clearer
I don't wanna waste another day
Stuck in the shadow of my mistakes

Yeah...
[Chorus]Cause I want you,
And I feel you,
Crawling underneath my skin
Like a hunger,
Like a burning,
To find a place I've never been
Now I'm broken,
And I'm faded,
I'm half the man I thought I would be:
But you can have what's left of me

I've been dying inside,
Little by little,
No where to go,
But going out of my mind
In endless circles,
Running from my self until,
You gave me a reason for standing still

[Chorus]

It's falling faster,
Barely breathing,
Give me something,
To believe in
Tell me: It's not all in my head

Take what's left
Of this man
Make me whole
Once again

[Chorus]
I've been dying inside you see
I'm going out of my mind
Out of my mind
I'm just running in circles all the time
Will you take what's left
Will you take what's left
Will you take what's left of me?
Running in circles in my mind
Will you take what's left
Will you take what's left
Will you take what's left of me?

borrring

yawn. it's been rather boring to blog these few days. coz nothing's happening to me. haha. school has occupied quite an amount of my time now. i hate it when school ends at 5 or 6. there's barely enough time to do anything else. i'm starting to get the hang of school right now. when i first started, i only understood comm skills, only because it's like English class. the rest is like computer language.

as i'm kinda new to all these, it's been rather confusing at school. i love how the database works, it's just incredible. but making one is the headache. programming is starting to be really fun :) maths is another favourite module but the lecturer is going too fast.

we've only started school for 3 weeks and there'll be a maths test next week. like what the heck. at least its not java or database. i'm still stuck in the middle of the jungle for both modules. digital media design is a breeze. i find it more like playing than studying in tutorials. fun fun.

yawn. anyway. i wanna go sleep now.ciao.